Scars
by xoxobecca619
Summary: Dany lays awake at night and runs her hands over Jon's scars. She thinks about them and the man who bears them. Ep 6 spoilers.


Scars

It was a cold night in the Lord's chambers of Winterfell, colder than any other night ever seen by the North. _The army of the dead were approaching. Winter is here._ Winterfell always had a chill she could never quite get away from. The fire burned in the fireplace and the moonlight dimly lit the room. A cold chill swept throughout the room. Dany felt the chill straight to her bones even thought she was bundled up in thick, heavy furs. Dany had only been in Winterfell for a month, but the chill was unlike anything she had experienced before. Even after going North of the wall when she blew fire on the Night King, the chill in Winterfell had her more frozen then that day. Ice and death were at the castles doors.

Dany had many nights she stayed awake. The worry and fear seeping into her veins as she thought of the war to come. _You have to see it to know. Now I know._ Her dreams have become nightmares filled with ice blue eyes, harsh winds, blinding snow, and freezing water. She will never forget that day. The day one of her children died. The screech she heard as the Night King throw an icy spear to her fiery dragon. Poor, sweet Viseron had always been the sweetest of her children. He would make sweet sounds when she was near, and always was gentle when he soared through the sky. He wasn't as big as Rhagael and Drogon, but he was just a fierce. Dany remembered watching the life drain from his eyes and drown into the frozen lake. The memories made her shutter. She felt frozen.

Dany sat up in the bed and looked around the room. Winterfell was so grey and gloomy. How had Jon lived here his whole life? She wanted to travel with him to Essos. She wanted him to taste sweet summer wines and eat suckling pork with honey glaze. She wanted to swim with him in the bright blue waters that surrounded Meereen. She wanted to fly her dragons with him over the desert and see what other kinds of mountains existed, mountains of sand. She wanted to see him in traditional warm weather clothes. She wanted him to feel the heat of the sun on his skin. She wanted to show him the city and Narrow Sea from the top of the pyramid she commanded. Alas, not of that ever seemed like it was going to happen.

Dany felt Jon stir in the bed beside her. They had taken up sharing the Lord's chambers as their relationship was no secret by now. As much as she tried to hide her love for Jon, her eyes gave her away. Lady Arya as sharp as a knife was the first one to notice the closeness of her relationship with Jon which was much more than allies. The Northern Lords had despised her at first. They wanted nothing to do with a Targaryen. Jon, the ever stupidly foolish noble man he is, defended her until his face turned red. The Lords had grown to accept her when they realized it didn't matter who sit on throne as the dead approached. Jon didn't do anything to hide their relationship. He would grab her hand in the courtyard and kiss her in the godswood. At Lady Sansa's urging they finally made their relationship known, it hadn't mattered that much at all what people thought as death approached. To be honest, Dany didn't care. She loved Jon, and no one was going to tell her other wise.

Dany turned back to look at Jon. He was laying with arms stretched out if reaching for her. His curls were a wild mess and he had a peaceful look on his face. Dany sometimes forgot how young he was. How cruel the world had been to him at such a young age? Sometimes she wonders how he survived it all? Did he always feel alone never knowing his mother? Did he have a good relationship with Robb? How did he feel when Catelyn Tully looked on him with hate? Did he ever dream of having a wife? A child? He told her once he took the black because he believed there was nothing left for him in the world. It made her seethe with hate for Catelyn Tully for making Jon believe he could never be loved. Dany was going to show him otherwise. She would make sure he always knew he was loved. She loved him with all her heart and she never wanted to see him hurt like that again.

Dany saw Jon's brow crease when he realized she had been gone from his arms for too long. He always reached for her in his sleep. Dany moved back down and went into Jon's welcoming embrace. A ghost of a smile creeped up on his lips when she held him. She was glad she could bring some comfort to his weary mind. He always looked worried, always one for brooding she thought. Sometimes she would call him the Brooding King to mock him when he had a particular look on his face. He hated the nickname at first, but found it would bring him joy after she had kissed the brooding look off his face.

Dany brought her hand up to his chest. Jon was the most beautiful man she had ever seen. He was built like a warrior, had a strong jawline, beautiful curls, and the most gentle grey eyes. His gruff northern accent only an added bonus. He never seemed to notice how the women in Winterfell looked at him. Their king. They would stare at her with jealous eyes. Dany didn't care. _You are mine. I am yours._ The most beautiful part of Jon was his scars. An odd thing for a woman to find attractive, but it made him who he was. To her, Jon was perfect.

Dany traced over the jagged scars on his abdomen. Rough and pink, looking like they were fresh and new. Dany knew Jon was insecure about them, and they brought up horrible memories. She always had to remind him that they were scars of a former life. They were there to remind him of why the red priestess brought him back. He was needed in the war to come, and if he had remained dead she never would have met him. The only people who knew of his resurrection were his closest family, advisors, and her. Ser Davos foolishly bringing it up when he was back in the throne room in Dragonstone. _A knife in the heart for his people._

Dany was always curious about them after she heard Ser Davos say that. She had brought it up multiple times to Jon and he always gave her a vague answer. It wasn't until he was unconscious and on the brink of death, that she realized Ser Davos told the truth. She had seen them with her own eyes on the boat after he returned from beyond the wall. She had seen them on full display as she sat next to him on the boat. He didn't seem to notice as his full attention was on her. He had comforted her over the loss of her child, and called her his queen. Overcome with emotion, she held his hand. Only when she tried to pull back and he held on tighter, she realized Tyrion was telling the truth. He was in love with her. Dany, the foolish girl she was, had let go and walked out of the room too stunned to stay. Her feelings overtook her as she exited the room and went to the bow of the ship. She knew she loved him before, but the depth of that love she only fully discovered then. She certainly didn't think he felt the same way. She didn't feel worthy of him, even though she was a queen. It wasn't until he came to her on the ride to Winterfell that she fully gave into her love for him and laid with him.

Dany traced each scar slowly with tears forming in her eyes. How could his own men turn on him? She tried to imagine how he felt when each stab went into his body. The very men he trusted with his life had betrayed him. He must have felt so cold and alone. He had just lost his Wilding girl and now the very boy who killed her put a knife in his own heart. If she could be there, she would have killed the boy with her own hands. She briefly remembers of the time when Jon told her he got stabbed. She had been stranded somewhere in Essos after Drogon rescued her from the mob during the tourney. She swears to him she heard a wolf cry in the distance that night. She remembers feeling so alone. She wished she could have been there with him to protect him. She would have given her life for his.

Dany finally reached the scar by his heart and the tears came. The final blow. The end. He could have been taken from her forever if it weren't for the red priestess. She'll have to thank Melisandre one day if she sees her again. The priestess who brought them together. Ice and fire. She could feel his beating heart under her palm. Jon had such a good heart. He was selfless, brave, honest, and noble. He was the kindest man she had ever met. He had always treated her as an equal and shared the same world view as her. He was her match in every way possible. The ice to her fire. She the fire to his ice. Dany felt her heart swell at the depth of the love she had for Jon. She would protect his heart. The Night King can take everything from her, even her life, but he would never take Jon. She would make sure of that.

Dany slowed raised her head and kissed the scar on his heart. She felt Jon stir underneath her.

She felt his hand weave into her curls and grab her hand that rested on his heart.

She looked up at him with tender eyes.

He blinked groggy from sleep and smiled at her.

"What are you doing up so late?" He said in his gruff northern accent.

Dany looked into his eyes and the emotions of her thoughts raised to the surface.

She stroked his cheek with her right hand. Jon looked at her with worry in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" He stroked the back of her head.

A lone tear fell down her cheek. "I love you…" she said and moved her hand down to trace the scar over his heart. "..all of you." She kissed the scar for a second time that night.

He looked at her with the same look he had on the boat so long ago. He raised her head with both his hand so she was level with his face. "I love you." He repeated her words to her softly.

He leaned up and gave her a soft kiss. Dany overcome with emotion kissed him back tenderly pouring her heart into the kiss. She lifted her head and leaned their foreheads together.

Listening to his soft breath Dany blurted out something she had been thinking for a while now.

"Marry me." she said softly with her eyes still closed.

Jon let out a soft gasp in surprise and moved her head up so she could look into his eyes.

He looked at her with shock and awe. Dany looked down with embarrassment, she hadn't meant to blurt out such a thought.

She looked back up at him and he just looked her quietly with love in his eyes. She made a decision for herself. Dany had never been able to choose something on her own. Vast circumstances and duty to her people always overshadowed what she needed for herself. She had resigned herself to life without love after Drogo and her sweet summer child had died. She never expected to meet someone she would choose to love during the most dangerous, and unexpected of times. She was tired of choosing duty and honor over love. She had given everything to this war, maybe she deserved something for herself even if it only was for a short while as death was at their door. She wanted him. She wanted this. She wanted to marry him in the moonlight under the godswood with his family there. She wanted to marry him because she loved him, not for political gain or an alliance with the North. She didn't care too much for the throne these days. So she made a decision, and went with her heart.

"Marry me now before the dead come. I don't want to spend the short time we have left wondering what could be. If we die, we die, but now we live. I don't want to spend another moment without you by my side. I want the world to know I am yours, and you are mine. Let the night king be damned. I love you and I want to marry you under the godswood while we still have the chance, not for an alliance but because we love each other." She spoke so quickly, almost mumbling the whole speech.

She looked at him with love shining in her eyes. She waited nervously for his response. She knew he accepted their shared blood relation, but he always been hesitant anytime Tyrion or Ser Davos brought up the subject of a political alliance by marriage.

He held her face in his hands and she swears she had never seen a more beautiful sight. She nearly cried at the beauty of it.

He looked at her with his eyes so open and vulnerable and smiled at her the smiled only reserved for her.

"Nothing would make me happier, Dany." He said in a soft voice.

She smiled at him a wide smile with tears in her eyes and grabbed his face and kissed him passionately.

He kissed her back fiercely and rolled her over. She felt as if her heart could burst.

The cold air faded away, the night king a pile of snow on the ground, the iron throne a melted pile of swords, and a dream of spring coming into her mind.

She made love for the first time that night. Yes, they had lain with each other many times before, but something about this time felt different, more special. Sex had always been enjoyable for her, but with Jon she felt as if the fire and heat ran through her soul and veins.

As he lay on top of her, deep inside her, she touched the scar over his heart and smiled.

Underneath that scar was his beating heart, and she would make sure it would keep beating until her last breath.


End file.
